The Purple eyed monster named Chris
by imperfectperfection99
Summary: If you like the name Chris or most colors and the character Draco Malfoy do not read this story especially those with weak stomachs In fact DO NOT READ THIS STORY! it's hilariously disgusting COMPLETE
1. Bad Boys and Long Hair

_Chapter 1_

Bad Boys and Long Hair

It was a day almost like every other the green sky's , the blue grass, the pigs flying, yes in the wizarding world anything was possible and all was odd, but what was even odder was the fact that no one I mean no one was at darkvaille beach on this fine summer holiday. A girl about 5'3 with dark brown , wavy long floor length hair, turned her whole slim self to her friend Mariah Magras and said " dude, like there's no one here man".

She responded "well this like totally okay Demetrius, we have like the whole beach to ourselves!"(She giggles in a high pitched voice)

"DUDE, like I told you before to call me DEMI, man!"

"Like first of all I'm not a man or a dude, I'm like a … GIRL!" Wallowing in there glee they jumped into the water and strikes up a random conversation.

"SO…"

"So like WHAT?"

"So you know those boys…"

"OH you mean the like totally G-O-R-G-E-O-U-S blond one, and that hunky brunette?"

"Yah Draco Malfoy and uhhhhhh that Blaise Zabini guy, well I saw them yesterday on my

Way home they were going back to their boarding school, you know the one for bad boys … ciesel faser."

"OHHHHHHH, yah, did you like invite them here …. There so CUTE!" Conveniently a

blond haired Draco Malfoy and a Blaise Zabini showed up.

"Now you fine ladies wouldn't happen to have been talking about us now would you?"

"Like oh course not!" Mariah said while Demi crossed her arms and gave a sarcastic laugh. Mariah the blond that she is bats her eyes at Blaise then flashes him, giggles and swims away. Blaise runs in the water, grabs her makes her face him. He pretends he's going to kiss her but instead puts his wand to her back turns her back around. Demi being the friend she is says "Not to fear Demi's here" before she can move Draco grabs her and puts his wand to her back. Demi replies "You naughty, naughty boy" in the distance she hears a whip whoosh. Demi yells "HEEEEEEELP" while Blaise makes out with Mariah.

Suddenly most of Hogwarts shows up. Ron Weasley the hero he is steps forward and says "UNHAND THOSE GIRLS YOU BEASTLY COWARDS".

Draco smirks, at this they screech like girls and run away yelling "The squirrels are going to get us, the squirrels are going to get us!"

Draco laughs manically at this just as the squirrels' human leader Chris appears. Draco ceases all laughter and bows to the squirrel king. Chris or Christopher I should say steps forward and smirks at Demi. Demi's eyes become and she growls … why? Because IT is her cousin. Chris just smirks and says "Cousin we meet again and who is this fair maiden, (he goes into a trance) her hair so long it arouses me…" Off in his own little world the birds are singing while he pets and smells her hair softly chanting "my precious, my precious, oh my precious"

"CHRIS" Demi yells. Scissors appear she grasps them and chops all her floor length hair off while saying "How do you like them apples!" If looks could kill she'd be dead.

Chris turns to Demi and says "For that cousin you will pay, now shall I take you again or your friend who by the way is a virgin and has long hair, it's a shame cuz we could've had something" At that Demi vomits while she remembers the night he took her virginity. Draco stares at Demi obsessively, Chris looks at Draco and Draco bows and starts pulling her away.

Demi franticly tries to get away but Draco's grasp is to strong so instead she yells "Do not drink the potion Mariah if you don't want PURPLE" To late she's already smitten in false love.


	2. Lower Than the Dogs

_Chapter 2_

Lower then the dogs

When Draco finally got Demi to the now empty Ciesel facer, Chris and Mariah were standing in the kitchen gazing into each others eyes "Oh, Chris"

"Mariah"

"Can we go back to your dorm after lunch please … I love you!" Mariah whimpered. "Sure Mariah why don't you head there now" said Chris.

"Anything for you my love" replied Mariah. Draco and Demi try not to gag; to spite Demi, Chris grabs Mariah and kisses her.

Demi screams "If you touch her I swear I will kill you! I swear to God I'll kill you!" If it wasn't for Draco holding Demi back she would have murdered him.

"Now, now cousin don't be so modest it's obvious she loves me and wants me!"

"She only likes you because you gave her a love draught! You ASSHOLE! And besides you don't even know what love is, (Chris smirks) RAPING YOUR GODAMN COUSIN IS SOOOO NOT LOVE!"

Demi pukes and Chris smiles "Whether it be false love, or real love I got to go, she needs me … or should I say my BODY!"

Demi is about to say something when Chris turns to Draco and says "She's yours and if she doesn't listen to you….. Kill her" with that Chris kisses Demi's forehead and walks away. Draco drags Demi to his table and instructs her to feed him.

"Feed me"

"Oh yes my master I'll feed you … my fist!"

"If you even so much as lay a finger on me without my permission I WILL murder you, are we clear?"

Demi sighs "Yes, master"

"good now feed me my Kraft dinner" Demi stands up to fetch it… "Did I say you could get up?"

"No"

"Then why are you up? In fact your head must always stay lower than mine. And you are never aloud to look at me" (2 dogs come in) "in fact you are never aloud to be higher than the dogs head!"

Demi in tears whispers "Yes master" and crawls to get the Kraft dinner.

Demi returns five minutes later to a furious Draco. "Where were you, the house elves are quicker than you hell a snail is quicker, you useless piece of filth."

"I'm sorry master" Demi mustered. Without another word she inches to where Draco is sitting, lifts his spoon to his chin, after three bites some falls onto his shirt.

"You can't even feed me right PICK IT UP!" Demi reaches out with her hand… "With your teeth you idiot, and put it back in the bowl!"

"Yes master" Demi squeaks.

Four bites later …"Oh forget it, go deliver the daily prophet, and be back in three hours, while CRAWLING!" "DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?"

"Yes master" While Demi was out she saw someone selling polyjuice potion. Thank God now she could save herself and Mariah. She got a free trial and ran back to the empty school. She changed into Chris just as she saw Mariah wandering the halls, great she couldn't find his dorm this was good. "Mariah my love"

"Oh Chris is that you?"

"Oh course it is, I have a favor to ask you, go into that closet and don't come out until I tell you too okay? Or I will never kiss you again." Demi-Chris garbs a piece of Mariah's hair and becomes ex Chris, Demi-Mariah and runs into Chris dorm just in time. She lies down on his bed and waits, Chris walks in.


	3. Hero and the Beast

_Chapter 3_

Hero and the Beast

"Oh Chris, I was just starting to get worried about you, I thought I'd never see you again" Demi was trying not to puke.

He goes over and kisses her she pulls away "There's no reason to kiss me I just want to please you."

"Getting down to business are we? Well just let me take my corset off, it's killing me." Chris takes off his corset and 17 rolls of fat fall out, Demi's eyes widen in shock. Brain how'd I do this guy (when did he get this fat?) . Chris lies down on the bed and pulls down his pants,

Demi screams "AHHHHH its purple … my favorite color!" Demi is doing everything not to look but the purple, blue tipped, green wart covered, branched off yellow, red cum, pink balled, and orange spotted dick is shockingly disturbing.

Chris smiles and says "Don't mind the stench or colors… I haven't seen it for years…ever since your, my cousin kicked me there after II raped her. That felt SOOOO good now give me a blow job."

A highly disturbed Demi-Mariah gulped and bowed her head and blows on it "Oh yes Mariah, your doing sooo good, Oh yes so good, oh YEAH!" Thank GOD he can't feel anything Demi-Mariah thought. Chris arched forward now fully Demi pulled away.

"I knew you would try to save your friend Demi." Demi turned around shocked and looks at Chris.

"Well you'll just have to do then…" Just as he was about to pour the love draught down Demi's throat Harry Potter the Hero breaks thru the dorm window and rescues Demi and an unconscious Mariah.

"Thank you so much for saving us Harry you're my hero." And they lived happily ever after … well the girls did anyways other then their nightmares.

"Awe shit that was close to, Ohhhhh Draco…" Draco burst thru the door "Ohhh Chris I thought they would never leave I'm so glad you married me and you didn't waste yourself on her." "Well Draco no one is better than you, now come and give sugar lips a kiss." And you don't want to know the rest.

So once again the day is saved by our Hero Harry Potter who has nothing to do with this story, it was just to terrible to go thru with it.

Draco: "I'm not mean like that and I'm definitely NOT gay"

Chris: "Yah and I are not fat, and I DO NOT have a purple dick, and I only have one I swear!"

Author: "Sorry guys, it started out good but went OH so wrong from there!"

Chris, Draco: "No kidding"

Mariah, Demi: "You so got your characters mixed up it's the very opposite"

Author: "Sorry girls I had to mix it up a little … if you're that angry go write your own story!"

All: "No thanks, you fans better give good reviews, because we DO NOT want her righting another one like this!"


End file.
